The saws were out and the great Maine wilderness received its yearly trim with renewed vigor. HAE's annual expedition went retro this year as less gas was burned and more trees were felled. At one point, no less than three saws were in the field reducing the forest into fuel nuggets for the HAE flames.
Deep snow and total white trash conditions forced the Half Ass Expeditions team to abandon the summit and burn great quantities of wood. With the addition of the wood burning Kelly Kettle, HAE's lastest camping equipment aquisition, the demand for fuel sent the HAE clearcutting crew into the forest in search of the finest Maine hardwoods. "We don't need no steenking gas stove" Timur announced triumphantly as he fired up the Kettle for another round of hot toddys.
Several agencies protecting the fragile northwoods environment voiced their concerns and warned against HAE's rapid destruction of the Maine woods. "Kiss my big brown spot" Vincentoli shouted as he felled another tree. "HAE is preventing the next wildfire by dragging down all this standing deadwood. We should be paid for our efforts."
Copyright 2009 Half Ass Expeditions